Well, I didn't think I would be here again, but here we are. I once created a music blog but it was lot before I was able to think I will profesionally do what I'm doing now. Around 10 years passed and I'm here one more time, creating a space where I want to write about emotions that come accumulated with music that I love.
I am a sports journalist, I work in this environment for around the time I spent without a blog about music. Leaving CZAS NA ROCK (eng. Time To Rock), a blog which was in this exact space until 2017, went in line with me getting more and more professional in working with sports. I was doing this in semi-professional way before and went full throttle to make my childhood dreams come true. And I'm proud to say they did.
I'm fresh after going to Olympics, something that every sport journalist has at the top of his wishlist. On the way I spent seven years working for one of the best outlets in my country, had a lot of fun at countless work trips, met a lot of people I admire and enjoyed some successes that I wouldn't even imagine.
Still I didn't say why I'm here again.
Maybe it's because Olympics put me in a place where I had nothing more to achieve in sport journalism. Recently I felt a lot of emptiness inside. Maybe last two-three years kind of set the path which led me to a deep end. For me now there is no real escape to say: "I know what to do". I really didn't for the last few months. Each idea I had didn't work out. I feel a lot of shame and blame myself for that.
I feel like this exact moment might be the last chance.
I still remember this childish, maybe teen-driven energy I had, when creating this blog. It was messy, opposite of professional, but made from scratch with all enthusiasm I could have at that time - and all the skills I was missing. And I had the right to miss.
But hey, why not come back to this idea of writing some stuff about the thing I love equally to sports? Why not try to make it more professional - as I got some experience and craft.
And why not give yourself a chance to bring the spark back with something requiring different approach, work type and ideas?
That's why I'm back.
With no idea where this will lead to and how many times I'll read this short text and think: I was naive. Maybe at least less than times that I will laugh at the piece thinking I could delete it at any point. I didn't finish it yet but I know I won't. That decision is made, I wanna do something with this piece of the internet.
I won't make any promises. Or maybe one: this blog has to make me feel fulfilled. I always thought about if my life and approach towards music will change if I make it something I do regularly and more professionaly. Maybe more to refer to as a job. I'm still scared it will and not really excited to see how. That's why I leave myself a safe space in the head to say: "it's not how I wanted it to be". But I still want to try.
CZAS NA ROCK was a child's chance to bring little boy to the big world using what he loves the most. Setlist Notes will be an adult's try to recreate this feelings in a new world.
Setlist Notes, because it's just like some annotations on the world of music. Reality will stand still with its list of tracks being played, and I will try to write something around it. Something that won't ruin the piece of paper but also match the vibe of what I experienced. And maybe sometimes try to help to understand it better.
It all starts with this little text, but will be something more. I don't know what exactly, but I'll try many things - concert recaps, interviews, insights. I have lots of things in my head. I'm happy to feel excitement again in this form of seeing unknown in front of me and helping it slowly unleash itself.
This time I'm writing in English. Maybe because I want it to be so different? Maybe because I see a chance and lots of creativity in it. I didn't do it before so I hope it feels alright, but at the same time helps me to evolve.
I want different to be the next better here. I want this space to be a deep breath I'll take and go through what I couldn't easily pass for a lot of time. It wouldn't be me to just let it go, I need to work out the way to make, what makes me feel live and lets me live, progress.
If you read it, I'm so happy you're with me on this journey. The world of music never fascinated me as much as now. I'm ready to discover it and tell you what I think. It's selfish, it's mostly for me. But if you feel like you stepped in to an interesting place - this will be a delight for me. And I'll always leave you a special Setlist Note.
Kuba
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